Taoism: Shit happens.
Buddhism: When shit happens, is it really shit?
Hare Krishna: Shit happens,
Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to me?
Protestantism: Shit won't happen -If i just work harder
Islam: If shit happens -Take a hostage.
Zen: What is the sound of Shit happening?
Hinduism: Shit happens, Again, Again & Again.
Runner up, but not a religion -really.
Masonism: Who built this shit?
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